Tag Archives: matt trueman

The Johnny Knoxville of Carleton Place

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This is the Matt Trueman I know, casually eating his lunch from the Spud Box that poor “I can’t do everything Jessica Irvine” fetched. When I first met him I thought he was the most obnoxious person I had ever met. But, I have grown to love him as the man of the hour (or something like that) at Motorhouse Mitsubishi on Hwy 7. He is a righteous person in my mind as he puts up with my mockery of his Canadian flag taped to the side of his desk.

What’s the matter Linda, you have something against the Canadian Flag?

No, I don’t, but, I think duct tape and our nation’s flag should not be used in the same sentence.

So now he has become a famous local person, and his hat size is going to become bigger along with the other idiots in that video. They are all over the local news: CJOH, Huffington Post, The Ottawa Citizen as the ‘jackasses‘ with the viral YouTube hit that has over TEN MILLION HITS.

You know guys, you are going to have many 10 year-old kids getting shot at by flying roman candles right? Matt, you don’t think these kids read or care about warnings? I can see the sales of drones going out the door now, and not thanks to Amazon’s publicity.  All of you should have bought a drone company. What’s wrong with Schuyleur, he never thought of that?  My boy is slipping!

Matt was interviewed on the news last night proudly wearing  a wife beater and girl’s sunglasses. Good Lord, what are you guys thinking? I must mention the other guilty party names that pretty much operate on adrenaline and ignorance too: Andy and Jason Stewart. I have no idea if those two are related, but one of them is going to die soon from these shenanigans, so the rest of the family better buck up.

Honestly Matt– Congratulations to all of you. I admire the spirit that makes people do things that they probably shouldn’t. Bask in the glory, you guys deserve it. Remember, the worse the review, the better for your demographic.

Since I posted this:

Transport Canada is investigating a popular online video that shows two shirtless men running on a frozen Ottawa River as a drone, mounted with Roman candles, fires exploding shells at them.

This was a stunt performed by a group of consenting adults, in the middle of nowhere, in the winter. Transport Canada has no sense of humour. Health Canada studies have lamented the numbers of young men sitting on couches and playing video games. These two got some exercise. When they’re done chasing folks with drones, maybe they’ll get a chance to address the exploding airbags that actually kill people. Oh no, there’s somebody having some fun. Well, let’s just see about this! Oh Canada!

BTW– If you think that’s bad they have a whole lot more here.

The Harlem Shack (Harlem Shake Ice Fishing Style) is one of my faves.