Tag Archives: innocence

You Can’t Go Back to Wonderland

You Can’t Go Back to Wonderland

When I was 12,  life felt like an eternity and I thought I would never be 16. At the age of 16 I thought becoming 21 might better suit my needs and everything whizzed by after that. The passing years became like a spinning record on my father’s old Hi Fi. The first few songs went by slowly and suddenly the record was playing the last track. I can’t remember when I realized my childhood was over. One day it felt like it was no longer a long summer break, but more of a continuous flow of time. 

Legally I have been an adult for what seems an eternity now. I have a car and I’ve voted in many an election. I pay taxes, but still don’t know how to change a tire and hook up a computer. But, I have always insisted in being kind and try not to let others determine how I feel about my life.

How many of us look back sometimes, wondering where it all went?  If we could just go back, one more time, and have a taste of that pure childhood carelessness — then we would be finally happy. But, we can’t, as no one ever can.

I still miss the times when life wasn’t so serious and the ability to slip immediately between reality and make believe was instantaneous. Some are willing to spend their entire adult life working in order to regain that feeling, if only for a little while. As adults, there’s always something down the line to do, or worry, or stress about. As a child this doesn’t exist, and the weightlessness of literally having no responsibilities is just all an endless summer.

I miss the innocence, as it just doesn’t come around anymore.