I Thought Growing Old Would Take Longer

I Thought Growing Old Would Take Longer



My very first thought this morning was a flashback of how I used to throw potatoes down the Albert Street hill in Cowansville. That 10 pound bag was way too heavy for me to carry from the grocery store as a child, and sometimes I got home with just a half bag of potatoes. I immediately realized that the bag represented my life for the past few months. The bulk of emotion from past health scares sits in “the bag” while some of it dribbles out each day.

At the end of June I had a series of heart attacks, then in January I tripped over a rug in the garage and landed on the hard concrete floor with a loud thud. Knowing there was not much left to give in the kneecap department, I lay there thinking my legs were not going to end up being very useful for a few months. I was right.

Throughout my life I have been labeled a klutz, and anything that was meant to trip over I have mastered that feat and more. A few years ago, even the family dog gave up on me after I tripped over a rock in the garden and lay on the ground in constant sorrow. When I figured out that maybe finally grasping a broken tree branch lying beside me might help elevate my aging body, the dog grabbed it out of my hand and ran off with it.

So while I have been healing for the past few months my links to my personal past have been blocked out. I have no problem writing about local history each day because if the former “cast from the past”  tripped or almost killed themselves in the 1880s it wasn’t my problem. Anger about having to use a cane wore me out as I realized my Disco dancing days were never coming back. I also wasn’t grasping our British family tradition of having “a stiff upper lip” because I told and emailed my story to anyone who would listen. I honestly felt that the world had to suffer along with me.

This morning I woke up remembering the potatoes rolling down the Albert Street hill, and how  a rusty old Quebec license plate on my tricycle gouged out a hole in my thigh when I fell off the curb. I believe the professional people you pay lots of money to would call it repressed memory associated with a high level of stress or trauma. But today the past finally emerged and it didn’t go to voicemail. It actually had a lot to say. In fact my inner voices insisted I immediately seniorcise my home! Today I think I have finally understood the only pole dancing I will ever do is if I install a senior handle bar on the bathtub. But, then again I think I will never be old enough to know better.

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About lindaseccaspina

Linda Knight Seccaspina was born in Cowansville, Quebec about the same time as the wheel was invented and the first time she realized she could tell a tale was when she got caught passing her smutty stories around in Grade 7 at CHS by Mrs. Blinn. When Derek "Wheels" Wheeler from Degrassi Jr. High died in 2010, Linda wrote her own obituary. Some people said she should think about a career in writing obituaries. Before she laid her fingers to a keyboard, Linda owned the eclectic store Flash Cadilac and Savannah Devilles in Ottawa from 1976-1996. After writing for years about things that she cared about or pissed her off she finally found her calling. Is it sex drugs and rock n' roll you might ask? No, it is history. Seeing that her very first boyfriend in Grade 5 (who she won a Twist contest with in the 60s) is the head of the Brome Misissiquoi Historical Society and also specializes in local history back in Quebec, she finds that quite funny. She writes every single day and is also a columnist for Hometown News and Screamin's Mamas. She is a volunteer for the Carleton Place and Beckwith Heritage Museum, an admin for the Lanark County Genealogical Society Facebook page, and a local guest speaker. She has been now labelled an historian by the locals which in her mind is wrong. You see she will never be like the iconic local Lanark County historian Howard Morton Brown, nor like famed local writer Mary Cook. She proudly calls herself The National Enquirer Historical writer of Lanark County, and that she can live with. Linda has been called the most stubborn woman in Lanark County, and has requested her ashes to be distributed in any Casino parking lot as close to any Wheel of Fortune machine as you can get. But since she wrote her obituary, most people assume she's already dead. Linda has published six books, "Menopausal Woman From the Corn," "Cowansville High Misremembered," "Naked Yoga, Twinkies and Celebrities," "Cancer Calls Collect," "The Tilted Kilt-Vintage Whispers of Carleton Place," and "Flashbacks of Little Miss Flash Cadilac." All are available at Amazon in paperback and Kindle. Linda's books are for sale on Amazon or at Wisteria · 62 Bridge Street · Carleton Place, Ottawa, Canada, and at the Carleton Place and Beckwith Heritage Museum · 267 Edmund Street · Carleton Place, Ottawa, Canada--Appleton Museum-Mississippi Textile Mill and Mill Street Books and Heritage House Museum and The Artists Loft in Smith Falls.

3 responses »

  1. I live in Dayton, Ohio and have come recently to your postings which I greatly enjoy. Your post on aging was terrific, I turned 70 this year and have realized that “I feel great” are words I can probably never again utter honestly. One thing follows another but we have no choice but to soldier on, that is the good thing about our generation, we just get up, dust ourselves off and plod on.


  2. I know how you feel Linda, been going downhill for the past couple of years and my 71st birthday is next week. I just keep telling myself that there are others out there who are worse off than me…and that keeps me going {{{HUGS}}}


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