The Star Theatre–or Funny Things Said in a Local Theatre




Photo from Carleton Place and Beckwith Heritage Museum

In 1910 The Starland Theatre in Carleton Place was showing moving pictures from the Buffalo Bill and Pawnee Film Company. I am not quite sure, and maybe someone can help me with this, but maybe the Starland changed their name to the Star Theatre????


The Man from Brodney came out in 1923 and Let Not Man Put Asunder was a 1924 American silent drama film- so I am thinking this might be one and the same theatre that was located in the empty parking lot across from the Town Hall.

There is a story that in that same time frame, a well- known Carleton Place C.P.R. man called Ambrose Breen and his wife visited the Star Theatre one evening. During a scene in one of the films Breen attended depicted a man and a woman embracing with a overly amorous kiss thrown in on the side.

Well Mr. Breen was having nothing of the such, and like a bolt from the blue the audience was startled to hear the following coming out of old Ambrose over and over until the passionate scene ended.

” Cut out the rough stuff or we’ll go home!”

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Other things I have heard in a movie theatre

Paranormal Activity 3: “If this is set in the 80s why didn’t they just call it Ghostbusters?”

During The Last Song, at the scene where Miley Cyrus says to Liam Hemsworth on the dock at his place, “I have something to tell you…” Some guy at the back of the theatre whispered just loud enough to carry throughout the silent crowd, “I’m Hannah Montana.”

During Star Trek: Generations, there’s the crazy Enterprise crashing scene. I remember as soon as the wreckage came to rest, someone yelled out, “RIKER! YOU’RE FIRED!”

At the very end of The Dark Knight Rises, some guy in the theater I was in yelled out, “OH, SO BRUCE WAYNE WAS BATMAN!?”

Sat watching Les Mis and during Who am I?/The Trial, Hugh Jackman is belting out “Who am I?” and someone near me whispers “Wolverine?”.

Watching ‘Cabin in the Woods’ and right before Chris Hemsworth falls to his death,someone yells out “Thor, Nooooo !”.

During Paranormal Activity 2, the woman in the film said “WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!” Some man in front of me said “A BIG MAC AND LARGE FRIES!”

“Grammy, you aren’t allowed to talk during the movie!” -(Me to my Grandmother at the opening of The Sound of Music)


This is what we need in Carleton Place. A Sound of Music Sing a Long!


The Ottawa Citizen
Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
08 Oct 1923, Mon  •  Page 16

About lindaseccaspina

Linda Knight Seccaspina was born in Cowansville, Quebec about the same time as the wheel was invented and the first time she realized she could tell a tale was when she got caught passing her smutty stories around in Grade 7 at CHS by Mrs. Blinn. When Derek "Wheels" Wheeler from Degrassi Jr. High died in 2010, Linda wrote her own obituary. Some people said she should think about a career in writing obituaries. Before she laid her fingers to a keyboard, Linda owned the eclectic store Flash Cadilac and Savannah Devilles in Ottawa from 1976-1996. After writing for years about things that she cared about or pissed her off she finally found her calling. Is it sex drugs and rock n' roll you might ask? No, it is history. Seeing that her very first boyfriend in Grade 5 (who she won a Twist contest with in the 60s) is the head of the Brome Misissiquoi Historical Society and also specializes in local history back in Quebec, she finds that quite funny. She writes every single day and is also a columnist for Hometown News and Screamin's Mamas. She is a volunteer for the Carleton Place and Beckwith Heritage Museum, an admin for the Lanark County Genealogical Society Facebook page, and a local guest speaker. She has been now labelled an historian by the locals which in her mind is wrong. You see she will never be like the iconic local Lanark County historian Howard Morton Brown, nor like famed local writer Mary Cook. She proudly calls herself The National Enquirer Historical writer of Lanark County, and that she can live with. Linda has been called the most stubborn woman in Lanark County, and has requested her ashes to be distributed in any Casino parking lot as close to any Wheel of Fortune machine as you can get. But since she wrote her obituary, most people assume she's already dead. Linda has published six books, "Menopausal Woman From the Corn," "Cowansville High Misremembered," "Naked Yoga, Twinkies and Celebrities," "Cancer Calls Collect," "The Tilted Kilt-Vintage Whispers of Carleton Place," and "Flashbacks of Little Miss Flash Cadilac." All are available at Amazon in paperback and Kindle. Linda's books are for sale on Amazon or at Wisteria · 62 Bridge Street · Carleton Place, Ottawa, Canada, and at the Carleton Place and Beckwith Heritage Museum · 267 Edmund Street · Carleton Place, Ottawa, Canada--Appleton Museum-Mississippi Textile Mill and Mill Street Books and Heritage House Museum and The Artists Loft in Smith Falls.

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