My German Shepherd Axel is a great dog and would do anything for me. Anytime I have needed comfort he has brought his huge head over to me to pat, and pat, and yes, pat some more. He is quiet, does not get underfoot, and most importantly loves watching Downton Abbey with me. I see his eyes look at me in love, or is that bewilderment, as I clumsily attempt to play the theme song on the piano.
However, he does have his moments, and I remember the day I trained him to sleep next to my bed. I should have remembered the words “old dogs don’t learn new tricks” as the morning after I felt like I had been up with a colicky infant all night.
Yeti at the Carleton Place and Beckwitch Heritage Museum’s Puppy Walk– August 2015
Maybe Cosmopolitan Magazine can help me decipher his late night movements. I mean how different can he be than a human male? Maybe, I should not pursue this.
Personality Profiles of Male Sleeping Positions:
On His Back:
His Personality Profile: His open posture shows that he’s secure and optimistic. Pay attention to where he positions his arms and hands. If they’re behind his head, which is known as the king’s pose, it’s likely he has a vain streak.
Axel laid on his back for about 15 minutes and put his paws up above his head. He had no vain streak, nor was he secure. He was just optimistic he was going to hog the whole bed.
Arrow waiting patiently for the “Bad to the Bone” puppy tour to begin!
Thrashing Around:
His Personality Profile: While it’s common to shift throughout the night — most people do it about 35 times — constant movement indicates your guy is stressed.
Well if constant movement means he’s stressed, Axel needs a boatload of Valium. Instead of sleeping through the night, he thought it was the perfect time to insist that I accompany him downstairs for a drink. Maybe a quick run outside at 2:14 and 4:41 am would be appropriate also. I could not say no to someone jabbing his rather large nose in my face a dozen times.
On His Side:
His Personality Profile: This is actually the most common position, and men who snooze this way tend to be laid-back and quick to compromise. “It’s the most flexible pose possible,” explains Dr. Dunkell.
At 4:30 am I firmly insisted he sleep on the floor where he proceeded to expel a lot of gas. I silently wondered if an interior fan without a window open was going remove the scent of corn-fed gas in the morning. What if it knocked me out before daylight broke?
Butcher” Bill Bennett from Carleton Place
One of the Schwerdtfeger sisters (Hazel? or Gladys?) poses in the snow with her dog Perky in front of their home at 68 Lake Avenue West sometime in the 1960’s.
Cosmo asks: What does the “sleeps on the couch” position mean?
It means the dog isn’t happy next to you, and thinks a spot on the leather couch might help his sleep. It also means that he is immediately marched downstairs as soon as daylight breaks to where he normally makes his bed. Both of us will be sleeping in our assumed positions tonight.
Me? I’m still sleeping….
Update… he sleeps right next to me every single night. He defies Cosmopolitan’s thinking. No word on male humans though.:)
Photos from the Carleton Place and Beckwith Heritage Museum
Buy Linda Secaspina’s Books— Flashbacks of Little Miss Flash Cadilac– Tilting the Kilt-Vintage Whispers of Carleton Place and 4 others on Amazon or Amazon Canada or Wisteria at 62 Bridge Street in Carleton Place
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