Pour Some Sugar on Me! The Demise of the Penny Candy


A few months ago one of my favourite clerks had attended an “adult” themed seminar along with 19 other people at one of the trendy local adult book stores. An armed gunman rushed in and robbed all 20 “students” of anything valuable they had at the beginning of the seminar  Still visibly upset, I figured he needed to chat and as I listened he reached under the counter and added three more bags of candy to the counter.

As he continued to tell his story he kept munching on what I used to call penny candy. I began to remember how candy helped my sad childhood days and how my grandmother warned me that candy could spread polio. In those days everything created polio but candy was supposed to be the number one culprit. But now that you can no longer buy anything for a penny because Canada has phased out the penny, and all we have left is memories.

My favourite penny candy was a pair of big red wax lips. Every summer day I would sit on the edge of the public pool kicking my legs in the water with the wax lips that were slowly melting in the hot sun.
If they were not available I would buy the little wax bottles and bite off the top and drink the liquid that was probably heavy on Red 40 food colouring. The bottles were made of edible wax but all everyone did was chew on them forever and then spit them out after the juice was consumed.

Our favourite hang out away from my grandmother’s eyes was Dion’s lumber yard next door to my home. I would go to Mayheu’s corner store and with 10 pennies come out with a paper bag full of potato chips, marshmallow filled mini ice cream cones, wax lips, and Popeye candy cigarettes.

“Smoking” on our candy cigarettes, my friends and I would sit on the top of the piles of lumber and have earth shattering conversations about why I cut my bangs so short like Bette Davis. We soon skipped to speaking about the prospects of picking wild strawberries in the field and hoped the ill- tempered farmer was not going to come out and shoot at us with rock salt.

Candy today seems to have been taken over by power drinks and bars that have just as much sugar and caffeine in them as our penny candy did. A serving of Gatorade contains the same amount of sugar as twelve pieces of candy corn. No longer can a child go into a corner store and find the delights we had as kids. Today, besides the dollar store candy, the candy companies have designer lines to entice baby boomers into buying candy again- and not for a penny.

Jelly Belly’s founder David Price has teamed up with Leaf Brands to make the ultimate gold leaf coated “Beyond Jelly Beans.” Described as an exotic trip around the world and sold in crystal jars they can be yours for $500. Complex flavours such as Thai Lemongrass Curry or an Indian Mango are supposed to create an explosion of taste that hits all your senses. I think I would rather have a pair of wax lips without an edible ego.
After listening to the constant drone of the salesclerk still talking he held up his penny box of Junior Mints and asked me,

“ Mint?”

And in a typical Seinfeld scenario I looked at him and said,
“Thank you, those can be quite refreshing!”

Penny for your thoughts?

Buy Linda Secaspina’s Books— Flashbacks of Little Miss Flash Cadilac– Tilting the Kilt-Vintage Whispers of Carleton Place and 4 others on Amazon or Amazon Canada or Wisteria at 62 Bridge Street in Carleton Place

About lindaseccaspina

Linda Knight Seccaspina was born in Cowansville, Quebec about the same time as the wheel was invented and the first time she realized she could tell a tale was when she got caught passing her smutty stories around in Grade 7 at CHS by Mrs. Blinn. When Derek "Wheels" Wheeler from Degrassi Jr. High died in 2010, Linda wrote her own obituary. Some people said she should think about a career in writing obituaries. Before she laid her fingers to a keyboard, Linda owned the eclectic store Flash Cadilac and Savannah Devilles in Ottawa from 1976-1996. After writing for years about things that she cared about or pissed her off she finally found her calling. Is it sex drugs and rock n' roll you might ask? No, it is history. Seeing that her very first boyfriend in Grade 5 (who she won a Twist contest with in the 60s) is the head of the Brome Misissiquoi Historical Society and also specializes in local history back in Quebec, she finds that quite funny. She writes every single day and is also a columnist for Hometown News and Screamin's Mamas. She is a volunteer for the Carleton Place and Beckwith Heritage Museum, an admin for the Lanark County Genealogical Society Facebook page, and a local guest speaker. She has been now labelled an historian by the locals which in her mind is wrong. You see she will never be like the iconic local Lanark County historian Howard Morton Brown, nor like famed local writer Mary Cook. She proudly calls herself The National Enquirer Historical writer of Lanark County, and that she can live with. Linda has been called the most stubborn woman in Lanark County, and has requested her ashes to be distributed in any Casino parking lot as close to any Wheel of Fortune machine as you can get. But since she wrote her obituary, most people assume she's already dead. Linda has published six books, "Menopausal Woman From the Corn," "Cowansville High Misremembered," "Naked Yoga, Twinkies and Celebrities," "Cancer Calls Collect," "The Tilted Kilt-Vintage Whispers of Carleton Place," and "Flashbacks of Little Miss Flash Cadilac." All are available at Amazon in paperback and Kindle. Linda's books are for sale on Amazon or at Wisteria · 62 Bridge Street · Carleton Place, Ottawa, Canada, and at the Carleton Place and Beckwith Heritage Museum · 267 Edmund Street · Carleton Place, Ottawa, Canada--Appleton Museum-Mississippi Textile Mill and Mill Street Books and Heritage House Museum and The Artists Loft in Smith Falls.

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